Waist training with corsets: The Facts and the Myths.

For ages, women have been using corsets for waist training. A smaller waist being mostly the ultimate goal. It is becoming popular among ladies in Lagos and corsets and waist cinchers are being sold with promises of a thinner waistline. Now, I found out that quite a number of people do not read up about stuff that they are about to do. Don't always take a salesman's word for it. Of course he/she might be telling you the truth but you can go online to read reviews and articles about the product to make an informed choice and to know what exactly to expect. Maybe not to the 'T' but at least you will have some useful information.

Here are a few pointers about training your waist.

* No bae, a corset isn't the same as 'body magic' or the popular brand Ardyss. It is not the regular girdle either. So it won't do the same thing.

* Waist training takes a while to see results. Several months of wearing the right corset for at least 19hrs a day. So you will need two corsets so when one is hanging on the line, you are still doing your thing.

* Your corset must be steel boned to make an impact. Not plastic boned. Some ladies are sold corsets with no bones at all with promises. Won't work. And experienced women say for you to get good results, your corset must be custom made. Made exactly for you. In fact, they say buying a corset off the rack won't do much. But if you must, make sure you get one that suits your waist measurement. Get a fitting. Walk into a shop, test it, learn how to tie it before you part with your hard earned cash.

* Know when to stop. Or calm down so you don't do internal damage. Read here to see women who take waist training to the extreme.

Read here and here for more information about waist training.

Have a lovely week.

Lily Johnson.
  

  

   

Posted via Blogaway

Dear Woman: What successful women are made of by Sade Adebayo.

Sade Adebayo is a freelance editor who writes for local and international blogs and news sites. Lovely article. And I like that the number on the list is ‘She loves herself’. If you are looking for reasons to love yourself despite the situation you find yourself in right now, you will find quite a number of them here. Enjoy!

What Successful Women Are Made Of

A lot has been said about successful women. Many can't even define what they are, thinking it's just something linked to a woman's professional career or becoming something important. The truth is that the term “success” is quite subjective and it doesn't mean the same thing for everyone. For some women it can mean being able to have a happy family and a career at the same time, for others it may mean to be a good mother, and for others just feeling happy with their life. So how do they achieve these goals? Here are some of the things successful women are made of:

Source

She Loves Herself - This is the first secret to being a successful woman. Indeed, a woman who loves herself will always know what is best for her in order to follow her dreams and achieve happiness.

She Has Goals – The most important thing a woman who wants to achieve success should keep in mind is having both long-term and short-term goals. They must be specific and not vague, and they must be achievable at some point of your life. Sometimes, in order to obtain better results, long-term goals can be fragmented into smaller steps which must always be kept in mind and focused on.

They Don't Hold Back - A successful woman knows what she's worth and she won't settle for less, at least not for long. She will never stay in a relationship in which she feels unappreciated or in a job she's not satisfied with. If this is your case, don't wait for change to happen but make it happen: look for jobs in your field in order to follow your career dreams, and if you're not happy with your man don't settle for less than perfect!

Happy New month people and some talk about sexual harassment.

May this month bring us love and joy and all things bright and beautiful. February will be good to us all. Just when I thought January had refused to go, February came and I’m like ‘Wow, we are in the second month already? Lol

Source

Anyway, a lady told me this story. She was in a bus and a guy came in to sit next to her. He began to chat with her, asked her where she was going and all that stuff. She answered politely. Then as the normal Lagos bus can be, he had to ‘shift’ so people can sit beside them. But what this guy did was more than adjust. He put his hand behind her head and another hand was almost touching her boobs. His perfect excuse was the stuffy bus. He was practically feeling on her. She was confused as at what to do because she felt she couldn’t ask him to adjust back because the lady sitting at the end wasn’t even sitting well. She endured this throughout the journey and the guy was even chatty and made it seem like ‘they were together’. 

You are what you eat! the issue of the B.O.

If you have been in a queue and the person in front of you or behind you is the reason you have a permanent frown on your face or some days you notice you can perceive your natural body smell more than before, you will want to know how hygiene and food habits can affect the way our body smells.

Body odour has always been linked to bad hygiene which is sadly almost always the case. Especially in women. Sometimes, it's the hair (unwashed and unkempt), bad hygiene during menstrual period, lack of proper care of underwear etc. I have heard people say that how a baby is taken care of hygienically will determine how good or bad he or she will smell later in life.
There are skin solutions that contain sulfur that gives off a bad smell after a while when used on the skin.

When using anything like this, one must take regular baths. While hygiene is almost the culprit when it comes to body odour, some foods we eat may also affect the way our body smells.

Foods like garlic, asparagus, and surprisingly, red meat this article claims might make you smell.

Click here to read the article.

Happy new month people.

Lily Johnson

Happy September plus Does anyone wonder about the other woman involved?

May this new month bring to us blessings immeasurable and God’s divine protection in Jesus Name, Amen.

Source

So just as some people have said though I’m not sure I like the way they are going about it, I really do want the whole Ese Walters case to just end. Instead of church members [if they are] going to blogs to trash the lady, I feel they should rather hold their peace and pray for their pastor because whether or not Ese’s story is true, the man of God needs prayers now more than anything. 

The ridiculous jokes are just too crazy. I read an ‘interview’ on Myne’s blog. Read it here. Sad and totally unnecessary. I can’t help but wonder how Pastor Biodun’s wife feels about all this. I mean walking in her shoes at this time cannot be easy. Take away the whole church thingy; I asked myself these questions: if my husband makes the stupid decision to cheat on me [God abeg o!] in as much as I would want him to feel the pain I feel for being betrayed in that way and how I would want him to suffer a little [ok not a little], would I want it to be the talk about town? Would I want it to be on every blog and every magazine and newspaper with the tag ‘sizzling’? Would I want to look at people’s faces and wonder what they think of me? Why the man I married decided to leave our matrimonial bed and seek sexual pleasures outside our bedroom? People are going to wonder if I am good in bed. Maybe I don’t give him enough action or his ‘kind of action’. How painfully embarrassing!

Up close and not so personal with a gigolo

I believe I have met different kinds of people in my many years on this planet but until a few days ago, I don’t think I have ever been in the same space, breathing the same air with a man who goes about dating women who support him financially in exchange for sex or this false notion that they [the women want this] are in a ‘relationship’. You know to at least show her friends and the world that she might be of a certain age and stuff but she has a man in her life. They might be getting married, [living in denial or she’s doing a lot to keep this guy that obviously can’t be kept] and he’s doing well as a contractor [Ok oo]

How did I know what this guy was? Oh he pretty much gave himself away the minute he walked in. This tall, dark and handsome guy [Oh well, I’m being truthful] walked into a room where a number of women were seated and gave us all a look that blatantly said ‘Nah, I don’t need you ladies. You need me’.  Then of course, I heard his story. Goes about with a phony accent 'being of service' to women in their thirties and forties who are single, divorced or desperate . While some of these women know his business, some don't even know because he probably approached them like he wanted a serious relationship or something. These women shower him with gifts and stuff you know the deal. Then he began to show off some of these gifts. His very expensive phones. Trust me when I say he was showing off.

This is just too funny. Source

Strolling back to the Original Garden are we ladies?

I am one of those people that believe that you should wear whatever you are comfortable in. Or whatever you think looks good on you. Because that way you will be confident and carry yourself well and of course this will make you look good. Somehow. And if it doesn’t, oh well, you at least pleased yourself.

Anyway, I don’t do a lot of dresses because I am not a dress person. I am a jeans/pants person. If you catch me in a dress, [or a skirt] then you are at a function with me. I am one of those ladies that would say ‘Halleluyah’ if I am invited to a wedding that I am not going to be any part of anything like the bridal train and stuff because I’m getting my pants ironed babe. [I know it is crazy and unheard of but I have a reason but still... ‘I don’t wanna go there’ *in Chris Brown’s voice] I am gradually changing though. Too many beautiful dresses out there.

Someone said my 'wings' were sprouting nicely. Loooool. With my hands down, the wings disappear though. #shrugs#

Of butt pads and men who only want to replace their exes who never left in the first place.

I haven’t been here in a while because I just have too much going on in my life. Let me not bore you guys with the details. I hope you all get this update because for some strange reason, I think people no longer see my updates, the lovely Toinlicious complained about this too so I am hoping the problem doesn’t persist.

Someone asked me what I thought of butt pads and went ahead to say all sorts of negative stuff about women who wear them. How they are bad women with low self esteem and how they deceive men with their ‘artificial hips and bum’.

‘It is unfair!’ ‘It is ridiculous’. ‘Now I can’t even see a woman with sizeable hips without thinking ooh that might just be fake’

Hmmmm.... Dude needs to chill though. I was tempted to buy him a chilled Coke. That one litre bottle that has made its way back in Lagos traffic. At least by the time he was done with it.....

Anyway, what do I really think about hip and butt pads? I put them right where I put push up bras, spandex, artificial hair and full coverage foundation. I use the latter sometimes to cover up blemishes on my rather temperamental facial skin when necessary so I am not going to judge a girl that wants to fill up her jeans or skirt. Am I ever going to wear them? No. I don’t see why I should. Some people are going to say it means low self esteem, not accepting yourself the way you are and stuff. Oh well, that has been said about makeup and artificial hair. You do know you have a huge problem if you do not feel good about yourself but I don’t believe all the ladies who wear them have self esteem issues though. Like my brothers in the streets will say ‘All na wash’.

Being a mother is hard work. Being a good mother is a lot of hard work. Being a poor mother is a nightmare.

Motherhood. Most mothers can’t tell you enough how it’s a beautiful thing to have a person grow inside you and you get to give birth to him/her, watch him/her grow, call you ‘mummy’ etc. Yeah, it must be and I can’t wait really. But most mothers will also tell that these lovely kids are only adorable until they grow up, have their own opinions [often different from theirs] and want their freedom [they eventually get this]. We all can relate to this and it isn’t always totally bad because some of us still love and respect our mothers though we aint that ‘adorable child’ no more.

Source

Being a mother is hard work. From taking care of the child when he/she was little to still advising him/her and helping them make decisions. Being a good mother is a lot of hard work. You have to always take your stance on what you know is the right thing. This is far from easy especially when you are dealing with young adults experimenting with everything they can lay their hands on from drugs and alcohol to friends. It is a constant battle if you have stubborn children.

Being a poor mother, [financially challenged] is got to be the worst thing ever especially when you still want to be a good mother. I will give you my reasons with some examples.

Imagine a widow who had lost her job and was finding it hard to pay her daughter’s fees in the university. She literally doesn’t have anyone helping her. She does petty stuff to provide food for the house but tuition fees, books and hostel fees of a university student is quite hard for her to provide. So her daughter began to bring home gifts and large sums of money that paid her tuition fees and settled all her debts in school and settled the home front. This took a lot of pressure off her. The provider was a married man old enough to be the father of her 18 yr old daughter. This came when the school nearly stopped her daughter from writing relevant tests because she hadn’t paid her school fees. So when this man who she had met through a friend offered to pay her fees, she didn’t have choice but to jump on it. The gifts kept coming; expensive clothes and shoes, gadgets and more money. Her daughter, who hardly had clothes on her back when she got admission into the school, was now an IT girl.

A child that looks like you might not necessarily be yours?? Fate plays a cruel game. DNA says it as it is.

I was just telling a friend that fate sometimes just plays weird games with people’s lives. Actually, I say this all the time sometimes as a joke but sometimes, I believe I mean it judging by stuffs that happen sometimes.

This man [let’s call him Mark shall we?] had dated this lady [errr... Mandy] for a while and they broke up. More than a year later, she turned up with a 10 months old baby boy that somewhat looked like the man and told him she didn’t want to tell him that she was pregnant because he had made it clear to her that he wasn’t in the relationship for marriage. In fact, if you knew the man, and you saw the child, you would be convinced it was his. To even make it more convincing, the boy was born with a mole slightly above his left eye and the man’s second son [he is separated from his wife] had a mole there too when he was born. The man didn’t tell anyone this but somehow just believed the boy was his.

Now here is where the problem lies. Mark already has four kids from his marriage and never ‘played without ‘protection’. So even when Mandy turned up with a child that looked a lot like him, he accepted the child but wondered how it happened. Did she harvest his sperm? He was sure that was what she did but why would a woman of her status do that? And you know it means she took a used condom and what? Very very strange isn’t it? Or did she quickly rush to a hospital..... What would that make her? Was she that desperate? Bottom line, it just didn’t make sense. And this drove Mark insane. What was her response when he asked her? ‘Look at that boy and tell me he is not your son’. She refused to talk about it all. So he decided to take the paternity test. Just to be sure. Yes the boy looked like him, had a mole that looked like the one his son has but he had dated this lady for a few months and the few times they had sex, he used condoms.

Source

So he told her, he wanted to do a DNA test. Was she against it? Not really. She believed he wouldn’t go through with it. It is a rather expensive test. More than a hundred thousand Naira. Why would he waste such funds? He was already taking care of the child. But Mark wanted a DNA test that would prove to him that he was indeed the boy’s dad. Then he can be sure that his sperm was harvested. And probably form an opinion about women. Someone would hear the story and write a circular informing men to dispose their condoms and stuff and pass it round on Blackberry Messenger and Facebook. *rolling my eyes*

Natural beauty products Vs Chemical based beauty products. Which do you prefer?

More and more companies are manufacturing products based on plant oils and extracts and using little or no synthetic contents. This is because it’s been made known that all these chemicals used in products eventually find their way to our liver and are capable of doing extensive damage. Some consumers are now very sceptical about using some cosmetics that contain these synthetic elements. Some of these chemicals like Hydroquinone, found in blemish control and skin lightening products have even been banned in some countries.

Now while natural products pose no risk to your health, some of them can take a while to address a skin problem. Why? They first begin to repair the damage done to the skin by chemical based products. At this period, you might feel they are not doing anything for you but the reality is that it would take a while to see results if you have been using any chemical based product before. It also depends on your skin too. On the other hand, most chemical based products work faster. 

Source

And example here is lime juice and Hydroquinone in the treatment of spots caused by acne or pregnancy. The after effect of the use of the latter however might make it rather undesirable although when using lime juice to treat spots, you will have to wait at least 6 weeks to start seeing results depending on the severity of the spots. In most cases with Hydroquinone, you start seeing results in a week.

Natural beauty products or products made with organic materials are often more expensive than chemical based products. Some are affordable but known brands are usually expensive. The companies go the extra mile to get natural materials that might not be readily available to them. Oils like Argan oil which is used in the treatment of wrinkles and Aloe Vera, which has over 300 species but only Aloe Barbadensis Miller and other 3 species can be used to treat skin problems, are expensive and hard to find. Yes, I hate to break it to you but the Aloe Vera plant in your backyard might not be one of the 4 useful species.

 

Source

Chemical based beauty products tend to disrupt the normal pH level of the skin while most natural products tend to function together at a balance with the skin’s normal pH level. 

Dear Woman: To effectively fight acne, you may have to ditch your soap.

Dr Jeremy Clapp did me the honor of sharing this valuable information on acne, a skin problem millions of people have dealt with or are still dealing with around the world. Many companies manufacture medications, creams and lotions to deal with acne and some of them really leave more to be desired. 

Source

He talked about natural products and skin health instead of skin care in dealing with this disturbing problem.

Read his article...

Acne is a problem that affects many of us in various ways throughout life. It is not only the acne attacks that are important but the scaring and blemishes that may stay with you for life. So many people think that acne is solely a teenager facial problem but back acne and acne affecting adults into their 30’s is quite common. How can we fight all these aspects ?

The debate, on whether natural, chemical or drug treatment is best, continues to rage. I strongly believe that where there is a chronic problem that nature normally has the treatment and that is the place to start. Natural treatments tend to be far less abrasive on the skin and are just as effective in terms of positive results.

That thin line between Sexy and Sheer Bravery

Taking fashion risks is quite cool and in the world of fashion, you are even considered as fashion forward. Some of these dresses however, make me wonder and wonder. It takes a brave woman who either doesn’t care about what the world says, is very very confident and thinks the world should see why or just simply well fashion crazy. 

You guys know why I chose the word ‘brave’ right? Because I know that there is no way in this world I would be able to wear these dresses. Ever. There is no way you would wear this kind of dresses and expect not to have a 'wardrobe malfunction.

Dresses that make you wonder: Risque or Honey but why??

 I can't even picture her walking without giving everyone a full frontal view of her 'you know'. But she wore this and paired it with heels that high to the Grammys. #Risque

Uma Thurman

So Uma decided to wear her good old panties under this number but we can all appreciate that it didn't do much good. Everything is on display. #Undecided

When the man is a drama queen.

Men often see women as the ones that nag and cause unnecessary drama and they are the calm and collected ones who need a break from all our troubles. Hmmm....

I saw him when he walked into the packed super market and believed he would behave because the place was packed. It was a Friday.

I was about to call on him but he made eye contact with me and began to walk towards me. Then it began...

Source

Seriously Mabel? Do you think it’s easy to drive down from the office to this place? He shouted at me, The traffic. The stress. The crazy people that were in the damned traffic. All this just to come give you the house keys? Why do you keep losing your keys by the way? Human beings don’t lose their house keys the way you do. How did you lose the keys again Mabel? How does a woman lose her keys in her parents’ place and had to call her husband to come from work to come give her his own set of keys?................ 

Dear Woman: Skin lightening creams and Blemish control products have the highest fakes out there. Beware!

I do not always want to believe that everyone using skin lightening products is doing that because they do not like their God-given complexion. There are people dealing with serious skin pigmentation problems, scars from burns and acne and have these annoying black spots or patches and it’s only natural to want to remove these spots. But I also know that there are people who just shock you by wanting to completely change their complexions. So they use these products to alter what they should have maintained. This I find utterly unnecessary. And also in trying to rid themselves of these skin problems, women also get carried away which is also unfortunate.

The best bet to treat spots is doing your best to stay away from the sun and use sun screen. Many ladies do not use sun screen and those who do, forget to sometimes. It doesn’t help that most sun screen products leave you with that white film on your skin but some sun screen products like Aloe sunscreen spray SPF 30 from Forever Living products doesn’t ‘white film’ you much and is very effective. So are most Neutrogena sun protection products.

Exfoliating your skin every other week with a mild skin exfoliating product also works. But exfoliating too much is bad for the skin and can aggravate skin problems. 

Playsuits, Women and Cellulite

A playsuit is probably one of the sexiest things a woman can wear. What with all that skin showing and legs, legs and more legs? It has this way of looking good on a woman no matter her shape and size. 

However, playsuits since they expose most of the thighs also expose other things, mostly cellulite.

I am one of those people that believe a woman should accept her body the way it is and not let her flaws make her insecure but I also think she should also realize that some of those flaws can be treated or well hidden. It doesn’t matter really and doesn’t make you less of a fashionista or less sexy if you dress to hide your flaws.

Source

 I see women in playsuits and other short garbs in movies [actresses], at events and on the streets of Lagos showing stuff that I believe they shouldn’t be showing.

How is it possible that a man doesn’t ‘do sexy’?

It was puzzling when I heard this but that is the situation. A newly married woman discovered that her husband wasn’t into lingerie and sexy night wear. He found them repulsive and actually said ‘Do not wear these things worn by prostitutes’

You can imagine how shocked she was to discover that her husband felt this way about lace and stuff. She had bought loads of sexy night wears, baby dolls and underwear to prepare for passionate nights in her marriage. That was what she got. 

I like this number by the way. Victoria Secrets has such lovely lingerie.

 Source

The couple had met in church and got married a few months ago. The lady was away in another state most of that time. Youth service I think. So they kept in touch and immediately she was done, they got married.

The lady obviously is troubled by this situation which was why she was talking about it. I don’t know how this has affected their sex life either. I think every woman wants to feel sexy, wear something sexy and gets admired by the man in her life. I could be wrong though. But I really don’t know how I’d feel if my husband wanted me to wear only those unattractive, long, shapeless night wears to bed each night because he felt that see-through ‘show-me-what-you-got night wears and underwear should only be worn by hookers. 

When a woman falls in love and loses herself..

Love is the best feeling of all feelings. To love and to know that you are loved as well with the same intensity. That smile when you remember some stuff you guys do together. That feeling of contentment that you get when you remember him. Most times, the world sort of fades away when you are with him. The touch, the kiss, the peace....

It is so easy to get totally lost in this. It is even okay if it is with the right man. A man who would not take advantage of it and ruin you. A man who cannot but destroy everything that comes his way. A man who is in ruins himself and can’t offer any better to anyone.

Imagine being hopelessly and desperately in love with a drug addict. What good can come out of it? He is probably the most handsome and loving man in the world. He tells you every day that he loves you and would kill himself if you leave him. And you believe him because when you didn’t call him for a day, he actually did cut himself. You are the only one he has because his family has stopped caring. 

He is good at what he does but anytime they find out about his drug issue, he gets sacked. So he is in and out of jobs. It is a sad situation because he does try to quit. But never checks himself into any rehab. When you met him, you didn’t have the slightest idea he did drugs and when you found out, it was too late. The fact is, many women would totally forget themselves and what is right thing to do in this situation which is checking him into rehab or running as far away as possible. They choose to stay and end up addicts themselves and ruin two lives. 

Source

It is not easy of course to run when you are in love. But if you love him enough, you should get him to clean up. Do it with all your strength and will and if he loves you, he would want to be better for your sake. If he doesn’t, what does that tell you?

Imagine falling desperately and hopelessly in love with an assassin/armed robber. He sent you gifts like Santa Claus after the first date. You couldn’t believe it. Then you began dating and it got better. He took to places that you didn’t think you would ever go to. You had access to his beautiful house and car. You loved him. He made you happy. 

Dear Woman: The real reasons why some skin care and anti-aging products are all ‘hype’ and no results.

Tracy Blatter of Raisin Face did me the honor of sharing this valuable information about skin care and anti-aging products on my blog. Some of the information I got from her piece are quite revealing. Women spend a lot of money on cosmetics and most times, we are clueless about what we are buying. Now you can at least, know what you are paying for.

Here is her piece…

Skincare is a multi-billion dollar business.  There are thousands of companies producing tens of thousands of products so it’s no surprise that women are undecided regarding what to buy.  The larger companies work to entice you through expensive ad campaigns also known as 'hype'.These campaigns often use airbrushed pictures of supermodels in their late 20’s to sell anti-wrinkle creams to women in their late 30’s and 40’s

However, a list of ingredients is the first thing you should look for in a product if you plan on applying it to your face.  If a list is not available, there’s a reason why it’s missing.  Usually, it means the manufacturer doesn’t want you to see what goes into the product.  Be a wise consumer and put the item back on the shelf.  If the next product has a list of ingredients, note the order in which they are listed.  

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration requires that ingredients be listed in descending order. The component which weighs the most is listed first, and the ingredient weighing the least is listed last. Therefore, nine times out of ten, water will be number one on the list and a healthy antioxidant or peptide will be close to last.  Although this is helpful, note that the  percentage of the ingredient being used is NOT required.  This is unfortunate, because some very expensive creams contain more than 50 percent water and just a few drops of “something beneficial”.  

The 'valid' reasons for dating a married man

I was listening to a group of ladies at the salon a few days ago. They were talking about a woman I knew [It is indeed a small world]. One of them was the woman’s husband’s mistress who sometimes boldly picked the man’s calls to say a whole lot of nonsense to the woman when she called to speak to her husband. No, these weren’t ‘local’ ghetto fabulous women looking for a man who would take care of them and pay their bills. These were women who dressed and talked like decent people until the conversation took that direction.

So this lady and her friends said that there were ‘valid’ reasons for a woman to date a married man and not feel guilty about it.

 1.       If the man’s wife nags the hell out the man: That is, she nags him so much that he is actually seeking solace in some other woman’s arms. So she [mistress][ is actually saving a soul by dating him; helping a brother out so he doesn’t get hypertensive or so depressed he becomes suicidal. According to the lady, this woman she was dating her husband and ruining her home was a hopeless nag. The woman is one of those people that told you whatever they had in mind but honestly, I wouldn’t know if she was a nag. This reason they said, was valid. SMH

Source

2.       If the wife isn’t as adventurous in bed as the husband would want her to be and has no intention of improving: Yes, they said it is justifiable if a woman decides to help a sexually frustrated married man. It is his wife’s fault if she doesn’t help him achieve his sexual fantasies and yes, she was indirectly telling him to go out there to ‘get it’ so why would she feel guilty for dating such a man?