The Elevens!

Hey dearies! Oh yes, I haven’t been here in a while. I just had too much to do. My final exams which I’m still writing, a particular project that you all will hear about soon because God knows I need your support and other issues that are just ...crazy. Thank you all for all your comments. God bless ya. *blowing kisses*

Adieu to all the people that lost their lives in the Dana air tragedy. I lost a distant relative, a young business man and an only son. May God heal broken hearts and may their souls rest in perfect peace. 

So the beautiful OddNaijaChic tagged me in the Elevens [Thanks sweetie]. There are rules to follow as usual. You must post the rules. You must say Eleven things about yourself. Create Eleven questions, then choose Eleven people, tag them to answer your questions. Let these bloggers know you tagged them. No tag backs. Let the blogger that tagged you know you answered their questions.

Okay.

First, I have said quite a lot about me on this blog. So to read more than Eleven things about me, click HERE and HERE. I haven’t changed much. Well, expect for the breakouts on my face due to stress and all.

Now to answer her questions..

Love yourself enough to....

Love yourself enough to earn the money that is required to take care of yourself and feel good about yourself. We all are not going to have Oprah or Bill Gates’ money but we can try to make a decent amount of money. Now if you are presently unemployed, it doesn’t mean you don’t love yourself though. Love yourself enough to seize every opportunity to prove yourself to the world. Love yourself enough to keep trying to get there without quitting. Because if you quit, you probably won’t ever own that car or live in that house or provide for your family. Prove to yourself [not anyone else] that you love yourself enough to want these good things for yourself and would work to get them.

Love yourself enough to appear good all the time. It might not always be the case but love yourself enough to try your best. A smile and a compliment here and there are too good not to get from people from time to time.

Today is my birthday...

Yeah, I got a year older today. I am grateful to God for all HE has done for me and I am so sure HE is about to do more because, well I have a few more that I am asking HIM for. [Baba God, You know how far o! Na Your own miracle pure pass]

 I followed my mum to a small village called Esepe around Oku afo area in Badagry where she is supervising a survey job. I took a few pictures.

The only church in the village i think. Check out the age of the founder before he died.

Thank you kisses and farewell to Ojukwu

I want to thank all of you that thanked God with me in your comments on my last post. May God’s blessings continue to follow you and your loved ones everywhere you go..

My brother is doing very well. The dude is one of the nicest people I know though he knows how to get under my skin sometimes. I kept thinking to myself, Who was going to get under my skin if anything had happened to him? I appreciate life more than ever now and I thank God for life.

Meanwhile, I find myself calling ‘Jehova!’ more often than not these days. If I am in a bus and it makes an abrupt stop, this lady would call ‘Jehova!’ Watching Lagos ‘okada’ riders in action hasn’t made it easy not to. The peculiar thing is the way I say it though; in this ‘well rounded Igbotic’ accent! I just completely forget where I am and say it the way my grandmother would. I guess I am yet to get over the shock completely. But I will get there.  And I do need to stop stunning people when I do that. It is unbecoming.

I did weep a little when I heard of Odumegwu Ojukwu’s death. My mum used to sing us war songs that they sang during the Biafran war. She was a child then but was old enough to know how this man was respected. Some were songs in praise of the war lord. May his soul rest in perfect peace. Click here to read a short article about him.

Wishing you all a great week ahead.

Lily Johnson

The saddest and scariest day of my life...

I had the most terrible experience on Monday 14th of this month. My younger brother Andre had gone to work as usual (he is an IT student at an organisation at Ikeja) and when he didn’t come back till 11pm, we knew something was wrong.


Someone sent my sister a message on Facebook that he had been involved in accident at Egbeda and was left for dead on the Express. That night, my folks went out in a car with our landlord to look for him. They searched all the hospitals in the area and didn’t find him. They even went to Ikeja General Hospital to search and was told that they hadn’t admitted any accident victim.

I don’t think I have ever been in that kind of situation ever in my life.

Meanwhile, we were trying to find out who made the call to the person that informed my sister on Facebook. It was already 1:45am Tuesday morning and we were yet to get any concrete information concerning my brother’s whereabouts. The guy that contacted my sister said the guy that called him said he had seen my brother lying on the Express, took his wallet, got a card and called the number on it and it happened to be his.

The biggest question was, Where at Egbeda? How was he? Was he still alive?. I kept shouting at the guy asking these questions. He had no idea.

The guy who was my brother’s friend gave us the number of the man that called him. It was around 2am and my folks were going up and down looking for my brother in streets and ditches. Best believe it. It took time him time to pick the call.

His story

He had seen my brother in a ditch near a filling station. He appeared drugged or something. He just took his wallet, took a card and called the number on it. So where was he, he wasn’t sure. He had called an ambulance immediately after that. He didn’t stay to know if they later arrived.

He described the filling station. My parents and landlord who had been roaming the streets of Egbeda began to look for this filling station hoping and praying that my brother was still alive. They stopped at all the filling stations they saw to search. The search wasn’t fruitful.

They had almost given up. My mum who is a very strong person had broken down in tears and my sister’s wailing resounded in the night. It was 3am.

Then they sighted the police and stopped to ask them if they had seen anything concerning Andre.

They said they had, described my brother to a ‘T’ and said he had been drugged , before being robbed of everything including his shoes, trousers and shirt and thrown out of a moving vehicle but he was lucky that he fell into mud and sustained minor injuries. They had taken him to a nearby hospital. My parents were taken there. My brother was unconscious, was nearly naked and hadn’t received any form of treatment.

The good news however, was that he was alive.

What really happened...

My brother entered a bus going to Egbeda at Ikeja. Shortly after, the guy beside him bought ‘pure’ water and gave him one explaining that the hawker didn’t have change. He was thirsty though so he thanked the stranger and drank some and told him the water had a taste. And that was it. Both the hawker and the guy were in on the ‘deal’. Nobody knows the full story and no one will ever know but I will be forever grateful to God for saving my brother’s life. And I pray that none of you would ever be this sort of situation ever in Jesus’ Name. Amen!

May God always protect you and your loved ones.

Lily Johnson

Things you should TRY HARD NOT to do even when it seems ...well hard.

Sometimes we are faced with crazy situations and we just do stuff that normally, we wouldn’t think of doing. The thing is, we do the unthinkable before even thinking about it. Then when we do think about it, we are sometimes appalled by our actions. And if the situation presents itself again, we might probably do the same thing because it is simply difficult not to.

Exchange words in a market place: Now, some of you would be quick to say ‘I’ll never do that.’ I believe you. Look at this scenario though. You know how crowded these markets can be right? Then a woman comes out from nowhere and steps on your pedicured feet with a pair of slippers that hasn’t seen water in years. Then she looks at you and hisses rather loudly. [Sheeooo!]

Or if a trader all of a sudden starts insulting you during price haggling. She said the plastic bucket was N250 and you asked if she would sell it for N200. And the next thing you hear, ‘You are mad! Get out of here! [You dey mad! Come buy am N2 na! Dey go!]

A number of cool and decent ladies would really lose it in these case scenarios. I have seen it happen a number of times. But then the woman keeps saying more annoying things and you find out that you just can’t stop talking back even as you walk away because you are beyond pissed.

It is indeed hard to walk away without saying a word. That is why you have to try hard to do so. Or say one or two words but don’t start exchanging words. Just take a walk.

Talk loudly in a bus: The only time some of us might be guilty of this is when we are on the phone. And that is because of the rather terrible network situation we sometimes experience here. You are in a bus then Grace calls and all you heard through a buzzing sound was Come, money, now, die. ‘What!?’ ‘Hello’... ‘Grace, I can’t quite hear you’ ‘Please can you call me back? I am in a bus’

Then she calls back. You assume she didn’t hear you the first time. So you tell her that again and again in a rather loud voice before it occurs to you that you could send her a message. Come, money now, die made you panic but what Grace was trying to say was that you should come take the money in the evening and that she was calling you now because her battery was low and would soon die. It is hard not to answer important calls in a bus. It is harder to hear what the person on the other side is saying so you talk almost on top of your voice. Remember to send a text message. That is if you have credit on your phone.

Exchange words in a social networking site: Now, why would you ‘tweetfight’? I understand that people would come into your mentions and say a load of nonsense but you mustn’t answer them back. Yes, I know people can be so annoying. Imagine a girl talking arrant nonsense about you on twitter because you retweeted something her boyfriend tweeted. Imagine a guy saying that you look like Daffy Duck on Facebook. Of course you would want to say something but do not follow when these people begin to go on and on, use your ‘unfollow’, ‘block’ and ‘remove from friend list’ buttons. It is hard that is why even some celebs talk back and forth endlessly with someone they may never know because he/she made an insulting remark or something like that. It really isn’t worth it. Say something witty and just ignore them. And if you can’t stand seeing them, use the buttons.

Swear terribly: Yes, some of us do that when we are very angry but can we try not to do that around children? And in an office? It just doesn’t look good.

Take calls in church: Some of you might say ‘What? Who does that? Well, people do. And they come up with excuses for that. They might be good ones but you can switch off your phone. Or at least make it known that you’re in church with a message. It beats the hell out of bending down to say that hastily. That can be embarrassing too with people looking at you and hissing and stuff.

May God give us the wisdom to handle all kinds of situations.

Lily Johnson

Pics from here and here

My humble opinion

I am so sorry for being M.I.A for a while. It’s just that I had a lot going on for me. I have been extremely busy and soon going to write my exams. I am so happy I am almost through with my programme and hope I come out with something better than I had hoped for.

Well, I also heard the stories most of you guys heard about the violence against women that made headlines last month. I still read somewhere this morning about a woman that cut off her husband’s penis. So it is not just against women, it is that some couples have embraced violence instead of good old communication. And the fact that people don’t do what they ought to do before getting into marriage.

Marriage is supposed to be a union of two people who after finding out they love each other unconditionally, complement each other, can live with each other, can tolerate each other, have mutual respect for each other and want to live for each for the rest of their lives, decided to make the union legal or bring it before God for blessings. Just as any relationship, marriage does have its crazy times but if there is love and tolerance, I believe it would never get to violence. The couple might have screaming matches to vent their frustration and stuff but would not bring a knife to each other’s bodies. 

The problem is that people are getting married daily for reasons that are wrong and even funny. Sometimes, a woman might marry a man she knows doesn’t love her but thinks everything would work out because she loves him to bits. People marry for money, security, to get away from family, to make some ‘prophesy’ to come true, to attain a particular status in the society, to be identified with a particular name maybe because the family is famous...it is a terrible situation.

Before and after marriage, couples should always pray together. I am talking about holding hands and praying for God’s guidance. There is something about you and your fiancé or husband holding each other’s hands to pray. It is very intimate. Let him pray for you and you in turn should pray for him then pray for each other, your relationship, your marriage and every other thing.

I still believe that if a marriage isn’t destined to work out, it wouldn’t. I am not carrying placards encouraging divorce but there are some situations that there isn’t any other solution to them than just walking away. Some women [men too] would have been alive or less damaged if they had just done that.

May God in His infinite wisdom guide and protect us all.

RIP Titi and Olori Bolanle

Lily Johnson

Love me or leave me!

I believe I am a precious being. I am talented, beautiful, intelligent and creative. And sweetheart, so are you! No one would believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself.
We all have our shortcomings and weaknesses. I can be very emotional and temperamental. You don’t want to see me when I am very angry. I might apologise for surprising the people that I care about and others but how can I apologise for being who I am?

This doesn’t mean that if you have a bad character like a destructive temper, that it is a natural thing. No dear, you have to get some counseling. And low self esteem isn’t something to be proud of. Get some quality counseling. I am just saying that everyone should be loved for who he or she is. The people that care about me should love that headstrong girl and accept the fact that I am an emotional person.

Men usually say that their women try to change them but some men do try to change their women too. A career woman is told to become a full time house wife not because that is what she wants but because that is what her man thinks is best for her. Some make their women go under the knife because they don’t like the way they look.
My dear, if you have to do anything, do it for yourself. Everyone has to love you for whom you are and if they don’t then they shouldn’t be with you.
You are not perfect. Nobody is. Everybody deserves to be loved except a select few who don’t know what to do with it.
Look in the mirror everyday and tell yourself that you are unique and wonderful and deserve to be loved for you. And to anyone that thinks otherwise, shout and say “leave me!”

Don't you dare stop!

This is for the average but aspiring to be much more than average woman {Whatz up!} now, I am one of the people that believe it is not over until it is over. Yeah, life begins when it begins! No specific year whatsoever. It is just you and your drive to make it and continuing even when those pessimists {some call them haters} think “For God’s sake, it didn’t work when you were twenty! Why the hell would it work now you are fifty!?”
Honey, don’t stop the pushing, the working, the hoping, the praying until you are…well dead!
Of course there would be obstacles in the way and most of them grinning “I love being your obstacle”. But you can’t let them stop you. Please don’t let them stop you! Don’t look at those pages of glamorous women and ladies in full colour glossy magazines and wallow in self pity. Look at them and say to yourself “I will get there”. I love that Boy 2 Men track especially the line that says “I will get through the night”.

Consider all that is wrong but happening to you now as your night. The sun is about to hit you in the eyes and behold, your better days are here! But remember, hard work and patience plus prayer would help you. Work hard at what you are doing; anything you are doing at all because what is worth doing at all is what doing well {please don’t think I am encouraging some crazy stuff, I am not!}

I am addressing the decent {okay she loses her balance sometimes but she gets right back up!}, hardworking {the hustle, this babe is everywhere doing her thing and there is no stopping her!}and average {she is no billionaire heiress but she sure does pay her bills} young woman.
Keep going babe girl. You will get there and when you do, we are going to pop that champagne!

Lily Johnson